Skip to main content

Define Yourself

I made the errant decision to take one of those Facebook quizzes. If you visit FB, you know what I mean. "What decade do you belong in?" "What is your best name?" "What state should you live in?" These are all ridiculous questions, of course.

Obviously, what decade I belong in holds very little significance when I'm living, well... NOW.

But answering the questions made me think about the way we define ourselves. The questions were as trivial as my favorite beverage and as meaningful as how I would spend my final hours of life. No pressure.

But am I really defined by my favorite drink or the way I spend money or my preference of music? Well, probably. Some are more revealing than others, but I cannot extricate myself from these things that when combined and churned through the years of my life make me who I am.

And here I am, a mom, with the life of my children in my hands. Who do I want them to be? How do I want them to spend their time? What do I want them to value? If I don't think about it now, one day they will be all grown up and I'll wish I had done things differently. Maybe I'll wish that what defines me does not define them.

So what can I do... what can you do? How do we not only want to define ourselves, but how do we want our children to define themselves? These are both very important questions, because as mothers the things we do and say are not only a direct reflection of our own heart - but they are exactly the traits we will be passing along.

I have heard other mother's say things like, "I wanted to be exactly like my mom because she was so wonderful." Others might say, "My mom was everything I never want to be." But my guess is that most of us would say a version of, "My mom tried hard to do a good job. There are things I definitely want to carry on and other things that I am going to try very hard not to be."

So how would you define yourself? Maybe take some time today and write a list of the qualities - good and bad - that you would use to describe who you are. What do you love to do? How do you spend your time? Evaluate. Are these the things that you really want to define who you are?

Here's an example: I used to LOVE to shop. I would take my daughter from the time she was born and go shopping for hours at a time. I spent too much money and this took away time from doing other things with her. I soon realized that I didn't want my daughter to grow up thinking that shopping is for recreation. So I made a conscious decision that I wasn't just going to go shopping for "fun."

You may find things are your list that get double or triple stars for things that you want to define you and you may discover that there are some negative or detrimental habits that you want to change.

Bottom line - I'm not a life coach. I'm just a mom who thinks and writes about it. If you try this, share your results here because that's how we learn... from eachother.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Give Thanks: Part 4

KEEP READING FOR A GREAT SCENTSY GIVEAWAY! There is so much to be thankful for, it really is hard to decide what will make these next few posts... but today is an ode to my husband. If there is one thing he loves, it's great smells. Although great smells come from great cooking, they also come from great candles. Now with kids around candles can feel a little risky, but then came Scentsy . This is a "flameless" candle which is actually kind of a throw back to the scented wax warmers that used a candle. No candles here, just plug in the warmer and the small light bulb does all the work. I'm a fan of the nightlight sized warmers, but the larger Scentsy warmers are quite lovely. Browse the entire Holiday Collection to find the one perfect for your home or start thinking about gift giving - the combinations are endless! And look at this festive warmer of the month (10% off): But now we need to talk about fragrance! Silver Bells is the fragrance of the month (als

Mom Spot: Progressive Pioneer

Here is another blog I've come across in recent weeks. She has gorgeous pictures and her post yesterday was truly fantastic. "Maine is pretty rainy in the spring.  And I lived in Oregon for awhile and it defines rainy.  So, a little rain rarely puts me in a gray mood.  In fact, this rainy, rainy spring we've been having here in Utah has actually made me feel quite cheerful!  Each rainy day has felt like something of a celebration." Click HERE to read the entire post - you have to see the photographs! You'll also find all kinds of topics on sustainable and simple living. Enjoy!

Psalm 16

This Psalm has been blessing me. I pray it will bless you too. Thanks to BibleGateway.com for making it so easy to share these beautiful words with you. 16  Preserve me, O God, for in you I  take refuge. 2  I say to the  Lord , “You are my Lord;      I have no good apart from you.” 3  As for  the saints in the land, they are the excellent ones,      in whom is all my delight. 4  The sorrows of those who run after another god shall multiply;      their drink offerings of blood I will not pour out      or  take their names on my lips. 5  The  Lord  is  my chosen portion and my  cup;      you hold my  lot. 6  The lines have fallen for me in pleasant places;      indeed, I have a beautiful inheritance. 7  I bless the  Lord  who  gives me counsel;      in  the night also my  heart instructs me. 8  I have  set the  Lord  always before me;      because he is at my  right hand, I shall not be  shaken. 9  Therefore my heart is glad, and my  whole being rejoices;      my